when i was with him,
i didn’t have to be perfect,
or even try for perfect.
he already knew my secrets,
the things i’d kept hidden from everyone else,
so i could just be myself.
which shouldn’t have been such a big deal.
but it was.

you know how sometimes, right in the middle of something,
you know it’s something you won’t forget?

at the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. so this thing, where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, is usually a load of bull. we pick and choose who we want to remain close to, and once we’ve chosen those people, we tend to stick close by. no matter how much we hurt them, the people that are still with you at the end of the day -those are the ones worth keeping. and sure, sometimes close can be too close. but sometimes, that invasion of personal space, it can be exactly what you need.

to let go isn’t to forget, not to think about, or to ignore. it doesn’t leave feelings of anger, jealousy, or regret. letting go isn’t winning or isn’t losing. it’s not about pride. it’s not obsessing or dwelling on the past. it’s not giving in or giving up. letting go isn’t about loss, and it’s not defeat. to let go is to cherish memories, but to overcome them and move on. letting go is having the courage to accept, the strength to keep moving. because letting go is growing up.

i don’t care how far you are from me, or how long it’s been since we’ve talked. i don’t care how mad i got at you, or how mad you’ve been at me. you’re still what matters most to me, and i’m never going to give that up.

Just pretend you don’t care. And don’t be surprised when he comes crawling back saying he made a mistake. And if you want to go, go with him again. But make him work for you. Don’t be his doormat. Don’t let him in the first time he rings the bell. Make him come back every day until you trust him enough. If he doesn’t come back after a couple of tries, just let him go. But if he comes back every day, then he’s worth it. Trust me, he’s worth it.

Over the past year, I’ve learned so much about love and life. Even if I could, I wouldn’t take back all the things I’ve done because they got me here, to this moment.

There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.

We all have that boy. He’s the boy we try to pretend we aren’t looking for as we make our way to class. He’s the boy that we lie about and claim to not care about anymore. He’s the boy that gives you those cliche butterflies, complete with the weakness in the knees. He’s the boy we’re thinking about as we read this. I think every single girl has this boy and every girl will remember him forever. He’s not the one for us, but he’ll always be somewhere in our hearts.

Yes we fight, but it’s only over stupid things that neither of us really care about. And you might be the most annoying person on this earth, but you get me. I know you’ll always understand the reason behind my frown, even when I never tell you. And that’s why I’m miserable after you were with her. And you know it, you don’t even have to ask. So you think maybe you could spare me the pain and just love me back?

I’m not the type of girl who likes to make a big scene when I’m with someone. I like how you respect that. We both know exactly how we feel about each other; we don’t need everyone else knowing that too. Because even though people don’t see the way we feel sometimes, sparks fly whenever we are together, that only the two of us can see.

I guess I never really let go because in the back of my mind somewhere I never lost hope that we would get our second chance.

I don’t know, I mean, I want to be his friend. I really do, but then again I don’t. You know? I mean how can you simply be friends with someone when every time you look at them, you’re thinking about how much more you really want.

He has proved without a doubt that he doesn’t need me. And if it is the last thing I ever do, I am going to prove to him, without a doubt, that I don’t need him either.

I’ve learned a lot this year. I’ve learned that things don’t always turn out the way you planned, or the way you think they should be. I’ve learned that there are things that go wrong, some things don’t always get fixed, and some eventually get put back together the way they were before. I’ve learned that some things stay broken, and that you can always get through the bad times. Keep searching, as long as you always have people you love you by your side.